A Life to Love: 24 Hours of Simple Changes to Something Better.

A Life to Love: 24 Hours of Simple Changes to Something Extraordinary.

Change happens in moments, bit by bit, with brave, small, daring steps that lead to something bigger. Sometimes they don’t feel that brave, that new or that daring – they just feel different, because they are. That’s what’s important, not the size of the change but that it’s different to what has been.

[bctt tweet=”Change happens in moments, bit by bit, with brave, small, daring steps that lead to something bigger.”]

It starts with one moment, one decision on one day – that’s all it takes to start something that could lead something extraordinary.

Starting the day.

  1. Start the day kissing. Or laughing. Or both. People and funny YouTube clips were pretty much invented largely for the purpose of keeping us loved up or laughing or both. 
  2. Go for a walk. 20 minutes will do. Exercise is good for the body, great for the brain and one of the best ways to put yourself in a good mood.
  3. Wear perfume – or anything that smells delicious. If you’re not used to it, just try it. It’s a lovely way to feel lovely. Just think twice before you go nuts with it. Too much of a good thing can be wonderful – or too much.
    .

    Out the door.

  4. Smile at strangers. It’s good for you and good for them. You’ll never know whose day you’ll be making.
  5. Slow down. Notice. Listen. Be mindful.
  6. Claim your place in the world today. It needs you. The way you speak. The way you move. The way you are – all as.
  7. Move, speak, be – as though everything is geared in your favour. This one will surprise you with what it can do.
  8. Walk with a powerful stride. Take longer strides, hold your head up. It makes a difference. Just try it.
  9. Make eye contact when you say thank you.
  10. If you meet someone, notice them – enough to notice the colour of their eyes. See the difference it makes to your connection for a moment – or more.
    .

    And back home to your again … Nourish, treat, nurture. 

  11. Nourish. Eat something that’s good for you.
  12. Treat. Eat something that’s comforting for you.
  13. Nurture. Bathe. Read – for learning or fun. Sleep.

This is something to have fun with, but fun doesn’t mean that it can’t mark the start of something wonderful.

Try them on your own or with a friend. Challenge yourself and, if you want to, each other.

See which ones you struggle with and then see if you can find out what that means for you. There is at least as much to gain from looking at the things that you struggle to do than there is from the things that come easily to you. 

Experiment with them and enjoy them – because change doesn’t have to be big, and growth doesn’t have to be hard.  

One Comment

Davy Allan

I was looking for something to help me and I read this and found this is what I want I couldn’t believe it please send more thank you

Reply

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Join our newsletter

We would love you to follow us on Social Media to stay up to date with the latest Hey Sigmund news and upcoming events.

Follow Hey Sigmund on Instagram

♥️

#parenting #parentingwithrespect #parent #mindfulparenting
Some days are keepers. Thank you Perth for your warmth and wide open arms at the @resilientkidsconference. Gosh I loved today with you so much. Thank you for sharing your stories with me, laughing with me, and joining with us in building brave in the young people in our lives. They are in strong, beautiful hands.

And then there is you @michellemitchell.author, @maggiedentauthor, @drjustincoulson, @nathandubsywant - you multiply the joy of days like today.♥️
When you can’t cut out (their worries), add in (what they need for felt safety). 

Rather than focusing on what we need them to do, shift the focus to what we can do. Make the environment as safe as we can (add in another safe adult), and have so much certainty that they can do this, they can borrow what they need and wrap it around themselves again and again and again.

You already do this when they have to do things that don’t want to do, but which you know are important - brushing their teeth, going to the dentist, not eating ice cream for dinner (too often). The key for living bravely is to also recognise that so many of the things that drive anxiety are equally important. 

We also need to ask, as their important adults - ‘Is this scary safe or scary dangerous?’ ‘Do I move them forward into this or protect them from it?’♥️
The need to feel connected to, and seen by our people is instinctive. 

THE FIX: Add in micro-connections to let them feel you seeing them, loving them, connecting with them, enjoying them:

‘I love being your mum.’
‘I love being your dad.’
‘I missed you today.’
‘I can’t wait to hang out with you at bedtime 
and read a story together.’

Or smiling at them, playing with them, 
sharing something funny, noticing something about them, ‘remembering when...’ with them.

And our adult loves need the same, as we need the same from them.♥️
Our kids need the same thing we do: to feel safe and loved through all feelings not just the convenient ones.

Gosh it’s hard though. I’ve never lost my (thinking) mind as much at anyone as I have with the people I love most in this world.

We’re human, not bricks, and even though we’re parents we still feel it big sometimes. Sometimes these feelings make it hard for us to be the people we want to be for our loves.

That’s the truth of it, and that’s the duality of being a parent. We love and we fury. We want to connect and we want to pull away. We hold it all together and sometimes we can’t.

None of this is about perfection. It’s about being human, and the best humans feel, argue, fight, reconnect, own our ‘stuff’. We keep working on growing and being more of our everythingness, just in kinder ways.

If we get it wrong, which we will, that’s okay. What’s important is the repair - as soon as we can and not selling it as their fault. Our reaction is our responsibility, not theirs. This might sound like, ‘I’m really sorry I yelled. You didn’t deserve that. I really want to hear what you have to say. Can we try again?’

Of course, none of this means ‘no boundaries’. What it means is adding warmth to the boundary. One without the other will feel unsafe - for them, us, and others.

This means making sure that we’ve claimed responsibility- the ability to respond to what’s happening. It doesn’t mean blame. It means recognising that when a young person is feeling big, they don’t have the resources to lead out of the turmoil, so we have to lead them out - not push them out.

Rather than focusing on what we want them to do, shift the focus to what we can do to bring felt safety and calm back into the space.

THEN when they’re calm talk about what’s happened, the repair, and what to do next time.

Discipline means ‘to teach’, not to punish. They will learn best when they are connected to you. Maybe there is a need for consequences, but these must be about repair and restoration. Punishment is pointless, harmful, and outdated.

Hold the boundary, add warmth. Don’t ask them to do WHEN they can’t do. Wait until they can hear you and work on what’s needed. There’s no hurry.♥️

Pin It on Pinterest

Share This