Welcome to The Sunroom

The Sunroom (For You)

The Sun Room celebrates the many different versions of human and as we do that, nothing is off limits. Anything you’ve wondered, noticed or wanted to understand – we’ll deal with it. If there isn’t the answer to your question, let me know. As part of the member’s home, I will be answering real questions, from real people. Ask me anything. Anything! We won’t give any names – none. If we needed the world to know your name, we’d at least write it on a coffee cup with something smooth and delicious inside. 

Being HumanThe ups and downs of everyday life.

A Beautiful MindStrengthening mind, body, and spirit.

AnxietyProven strategies for calmer, braver living.

DepressionStrengthening against, and healing from depression.

With KidsRaising children who are happy, emotionally healthy, strong, confident, and brave.

With TeensUnderstanding your adolescent, strengthening your connection, helping them thrive.

With OthersBeing with friends, family, intimate others. Building intimacy and connection. When relationships break.

Difficult RelationshipsDealing with difficult relationships – work, family, exes, frenemies, toxic people, relationships you can’t walk away from – but wish you could.

The Sunroom - Real Questions Answered

Real Questions AnsweredAsk me anything. Real questions from real people.

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The point of any ‘discipline’ is to teach, not to punish. (‘Disciple’ means student, follower, learner.)

Children don’t learn through punishment. They comply through punishment, but the mechanism is control and fear. 

The problem with this, is that the goal becomes avoiding us when things go wrong, rather than seeking us out. We can’t influence them if we’ve taught them to keep their messes hidden from us. 

We can’t guide our kiddos if they aren’t open to us, and they won’t be open to us if they are scared of what we will do. 

We all have an instinctive need to stay relationally safe. This means feeling free from rejection, shame, humiliation. The problem with traditional discipline is that it rejects and judges the child, rather than the behaviour. 

Hold them close, reject their behaviour. 

This makes it more likely that they will turn toward us instead of away from us. It opens the way for us to guide, lead, teach. It makes it safe for them to turn and face what’s happened so they can learn what they might do differently in the future.

Rather than, ‘How do I scare them out of bad behaviour?’ try, ‘How do I help them to do better next time?’ 

Is the way you respond to their messy decisions or behaviour more likely to drive them away from you in critical times or towards you? Let it be towards you.

This doesn’t mean giving a free pass on big behaviour. It means rather than leading through fear and shame, we lead through connection, conversation and education. 

The ‘consequence’ for big behaviour shouldn’t be punishment to make them feel bad, but the repairing of any damage so they can feel the good in who they are. It’s the conversation with you where they turn and face their behaviour. This will always be easier when they feel you loving them, and embracing who they are, even when you reject what they do.♥️
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#parent #parents #mindfulparenting #gentleparenting
Kununurra I’m so excited to be with you tonight. I’ll be giving you super practical ways to strengthen your kiddos and teens against all sorts and all levels of anxiety - big anxiety, little anxiety, anxiety about school, separation, trying new things - all of it. You’ll walk away with things you can do tonight - and I can’t wait! Afterwards we’ll have time for a chat where we can dive into your questions (my favourite part). This is a free event organised by the Parenting Connection WA (I love this organisation so much!). The link for tickets is in my story♥️
Hello Broome! Can’t wait to see you tonight. Tickets still available. The link is in my story. 

Thank you Parenting Connection WA for bringing me here and for the incredible work you do to support and strengthen families.♥️
What a weekend! Thank you Sydney for your open hearts, minds and arms this weekend at @resilientkidsconference. Your energy and warmth were everything.♥️
I LOVE being able to work with early childhood centres and schools. The most meaningful, enduring moments of growth and healing happen on those everyday moments kids have with their everyday adults - parents, carers, teachers. It takes a village doesn’t it.♥️

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