Where the Science of Psychology Meets the Art of Being Human

Why the People We Choose Is the Most Important Choice We Make


It’s been said, not sure where, that we become average of the five people we choose to spend the most time with. It makes sense that over time, we become more open to the beliefs, the view of the world, and the view of ourselves of those we hold closer.

Some of these people see us at our best. Through their eyes we see the best version of ourselves we can be and when it’s strong and unwavering it’s almost impossible not to believe it. 

They’re the ones who see the beauty in us even when it’s not that pretty and believe in us even when a different truth might seem so much bigger. They stand on the edge of the fire with us and they don’t shrink back and when we’re too exhausted to stand there by ourselve,s they’ll hold us up for a while. 

These are the keepers.

Then there are the others. They’re the ones we walk away from feeling less than. 

Being around those who fade us isn’t the worst thing. Loving them is. Because when we love, our guard is dropped and we become exposed to the things they say or do, or confused and saddened because of the things they withhold

Unless we choose to armour ourselves with steel skin – and that has its own consequences – we can’t help but be shaped by those who we choose to hold close. Choose wisely. We can’t always choose who is around us, but we can choose who we allow in.

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