by Karen Young (BSc)(Psych)(Hons)MastGestTher

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How to Reduce Stress – 6 Ways

How to Reduce Stress - 6 Ways

Life and stress can feel like a package deal but if stress is allowed to dig its claws in, it will do damage. Time to break those two up. The human brain can’t do everything it has to do – keep us alive, thinking, feeling, doing – and on top of that deal with the assault from stress. Here’s how to reduce stress before it gets it’s curly hooks in too deep:

  1. Connect with people.

    Humans have an innate, primitive need for connection, but life and too much time with those who give more than they take, can make hiding away from the world and all its neighbours a very attractive option. Spending time with people can tweak your perception of things and give you a laugh – which also releases feel-good hormones. 

  2. Be active.

    Yep, you’ve heard it all before, but that’s because it actually works. Physical activity clears your head and releases your feel-good endorphins. Exercise also improves sleep, which brings me to …

  3. Sleep.

    While we are asleep, our brain is hard at work. During sleep, the brain processes the emotions and issues that are leftover from the day. It’s why you’ll often feel better about things after a good sleep – because your brain has been busy looking after you.

  4. Do what you love.

    Sounds simple enough if you know what that is but many people don’t. If you don’t know what you love, try something you’ve never tried or something you haven’t tried for a while. What did you love doing for fun when you were a child? Painting? Dancing? Kicking a ball? Chances are you’ll still love doing it.

  5. Make time for yourself.

    If you’re way down your list of priorities, get out of your own way and bump yourself well up the list. Making time to de-stress is the very thing that will improve the way you function in every other part of your life – relationships, work, your own physical health. You wouldn’t skip brushing your teeth because of a lack of time – well, maybe once or twice but you wouldn’t let it go for long. Granted, brushing your teeth doesn’t take a lot of time but if it took say, 30 minutes a day instead of 5, would you let your teeth go? So why would you give your mental health less priority than your dental health. 

  6. Listen to music.

    ‘Weightless by Marconi Union has been scientifically proven to lower blood pressure, slow heart rate and reduce cortisol (the stress hormone). You can read about the incredible effects of ‘Weightless’ here and find the link to the song here. While we’re on relaxing beats …

The top ten list of relaxing songs are:

  • 1. Weightless (Marconi Union)
  • 2. Electra (Airstream)
  • 3. Mellomaniac (DJ Shah – Chill Out Mix)
  • 4. Watermark (Enya)
  • 5. Strawberry Swing (Coldplay)
  • 6. Please Don’t Go (Barcelona)
  • 7. Pure Shores (All Saints
  • 8. Someone Like You (Adele)
  • 9. Canzonetta Sull’aria (Mozart)
  • 10. We Can Fly (Café Del Mar).

And finally …

Anything you do limit your exposure to stress, or diminish your experience of it is important. So important in fact, that if your brain could it would breathe a heavy sigh of relief and leave a heady thank you note on your pillow. 

2 Comments

Sharon H

Sometimes easier said than done, but I think we need to be reminded that there are always things we can do to help manage stress. My problem is that a huge chunk of my stress comes from things that I can’t change. And it has been going on almost daily for 10 years or more. However, this article has helped me be aware of mechanisms that help and what is truly important. Thank you for this, I really needed to be reminded of what I can do in the here and now.

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karenyoung_heysigmund

When times feel uncertain or your own anxiety feels big, come home to the things that make sense.

Come home to each other, to stillness, to play, to rest, and conversation.

Come home to listening more openly and caring more deeply, to nature, and warm baths, and being more deliberate, to fighting for what we can control, and the soft surrender to what we can’t.

Come home to stories, and music, and to the safety of your tribe.

Come home to that part of you that is timeless, and strong, and still, and wise, and which knows that, like everything that has ever felt bigger than you for a while, you will get them and you through this.♥️

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Apr 18

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When times feel uncertain or your own anxiety feels big, come home to the things that make sense. Come home to each other, to stillness, to play, to rest, and conversation. Come home to listening more openly and caring more deeply, to nature, and warm baths, and being more deliberate, to fighting for what we can control, and the soft surrender to what we can’t. Come home to stories, and music, and to the safety of your tribe. Come home to that part of you that is timeless, and strong, and still, and wise, and which knows that, like everything that has ever felt bigger than you for a while, you will get them and you through this.♥️

karenyoung_heysigmund

Separation anxiety can come with a tail whip - not only does it swipe at kids, but it will so often feel brutal for their important adults too.

If your child struggle to separate at school, or if bedtimes tougher than you’d like them to be, or if ‘goodbye’ often come with tears or pleas to stay, or the ‘fun’ from activities or play dates get lost in the anxiety of being away from you, I hear you.

There’s a really good reason for all of these, and none of them have anything to do with your parenting, or your child not being ‘brave enough’. Promise. And I have something for you.

My 2 hour on-demand separation anxiety webinar is now available for purchase.

This webinar is full of practical, powerful strategies and information to support your young person to feel safer, calmer, and braver when they are away from you.

We’ll explore why separation anxiety happens and powerful strategies you can use straight away to support your child. Most importantly, you’ll be strengthening them in ways that serve them not just for now but for the rest of their lives.

Access to the recording will be available for 30 days from the date of purchase.

Link to shop in bio.

https://www.heysigmund.com/products/separation-anxiety-how-to-build-their-brave/

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Apr 4

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Separation anxiety can come with a tail whip - not only does it swipe at kids, but it will so often feel brutal for their important adults too. If your child struggle to separate at school, or if bedtimes tougher than you’d like them to be, or if ‘goodbye’ often come with tears or pleas to stay, or the ‘fun’ from activities or play dates get lost in the anxiety of being away from you, I hear you. There’s a really good reason for all of these, and none of them have anything to do with your parenting, or your child not being ‘brave enough’. Promise. And I have something for you. My 2 hour on-demand separation anxiety webinar is now available for purchase. This webinar is full of practical, powerful strategies and information to support your young person to feel safer, calmer, and braver when they are away from you. We’ll explore why separation anxiety happens and powerful strategies you can use straight away to support your child. Most importantly, you’ll be strengthening them in ways that serve them not just for now but for the rest of their lives. Access to the recording will be available for 30 days from the date of purchase. Link to shop in bio. https://www.heysigmund.com/products/separation-anxiety-how-to-build-their-brave/

karenyoung_heysigmund

The more we treat anxiety as a problem, or as something to be avoided, the more we inadvertently turn them away from the safe, growthful, brave things that drive it.

On the other hand, when we make space for anxiety, let it in, welcome it, be with it, the more we make way for them to recognise that anxiety isn’t something they need to avoid. They can feel anxious and do brave.

As long as they are safe, let them know this. Let them see you believing them that this feels big, and believing in them, that they can handle the big.

‘Yes this feels scary. Of course it does - you’re doing something important/ new/ hard. I know you can do this. How can I help you feel brave?’♥️

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Mar 21

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The more we treat anxiety as a problem, or as something to be avoided, the more we inadvertently turn them away from the safe, growthful, brave things that drive it. On the other hand, when we make space for anxiety, let it in, welcome it, be with it, the more we make way for them to recognise that anxiety isn’t something they need to avoid. They can feel anxious and do brave. As long as they are safe, let them know this. Let them see you believing them that this feels big, and believing in them, that they can handle the big. ‘Yes this feels scary. Of course it does - you’re doing something important/ new/ hard. I know you can do this. How can I help you feel brave?’♥️

karenyoung_heysigmund

I’ve loved working with @sccrcentre over the last 10 years. They do profoundly important work with families - keeping connections, reducing clinflict, building relationships - and they do it so incredibly well. @sccrcentre thank you for everything you do, and for letting me be a part of it. I love what you do and what you stand for. Your work over the last decade has been life-changing for so many. I know the next decade will be even more so.♥️

In their words …
Posted @withregram • @sccrcentre Over the next fortnight, as we prepare to mark our 10th anniversary (28 March), we want to re-share the great partners we’ve worked with over the past decade. We start today with Karen Young of Hey Sigmund.

Back in 2021, when we were still struggling with covid and lockdowns, Karen spoke as part of our online conference on ‘Strengthening the relationship between you & your teen’. It was a great talk and I’m delighted that you can still listen to it via the link in the bio.

Karen also blogged about our work for the Hey Sigmund website in 2018. ‘How to Strengthen Your Relationship With Your Children and Teens by Understanding Their Unique Brain Chemistry (by SCCR)’, which is still available to read - see link in bio.

#conflictresolution #conflict #families #family #mediation #earlyintervention #decade #anniversary #digital #scotland #scottish #cyrenians #psychology #relationships #children #teens #brain #brainchemistry #neuroscience

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Mar 18

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I’ve loved working with @sccrcentre over the last 10 years. They do profoundly important work with families - keeping connections, reducing clinflict, building relationships - and they do it so incredibly well. @sccrcentre thank you for everything you do, and for letting me be a part of it. I love what you do and what you stand for. Your work over the last decade has been life-changing for so many. I know the next decade will be even more so.♥️ In their words … Posted @withregram • @sccrcentre Over the next fortnight, as we prepare to mark our 10th anniversary (28 March), we want to re-share the great partners we’ve worked with over the past decade. We start today with Karen Young of Hey Sigmund. Back in 2021, when we were still struggling with covid and lockdowns, Karen spoke as part of our online conference on ‘Strengthening the relationship between you & your teen’. It was a great talk and I’m delighted that you can still listen to it via the link in the bio. Karen also blogged about our work for the Hey Sigmund website in 2018. ‘How to Strengthen Your Relationship With Your Children and Teens by Understanding Their Unique Brain Chemistry (by SCCR)’, which is still available to read - see link in bio. #conflictresolution #conflict #families #family #mediation #earlyintervention #decade #anniversary #digital #scotland #scottish #cyrenians #psychology #relationships #children #teens #brain #brainchemistry #neuroscience

karenyoung_heysigmund

I often go into schools to talk to kids and teens about anxiety and big feelings.

I always ask, ‘Who’s tried breathing through big feels and thinks it’s a load of rubbish?’ Most of them put their hand up. I put my hand up too, ‘Me too,’ I tell them, ‘I used to think the same as you. But now I know why it didn’t work, and what I needed to do to give me this powerful tool (and it’s so powerful!) that can calm anxiety, anger - all big feelings.’

The thing is though, all powertools need a little instruction and practice to use them well. Breathing is no different. Even though we’ve been breathing since we were born, we haven’t been strong breathing through big feelings.

When the ‘feeling brain’ is upset, it drives short shallow breathing. This is instinctive. In the same ways we have to teach our bodies how to walk, ride a bike, talk, we also have to teach our brains how to breathe during big feelings. We do this by practising slow, strong breathing when we’re calm.

We also have to make the ‘why’ clear. I talk about the ‘why’ for strong breathing in Hey Warrior, Dear You Love From Your Brain, and Ups and Downs. Our kids are hungry for the science, and they deserve the information that will make this all make sense. Breathing is like a lullaby for the amygdala - but only when it’s practised lots during calm.♥️

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Mar 14

Open
I often go into schools to talk to kids and teens about anxiety and big feelings. I always ask, ‘Who’s tried breathing through big feels and thinks it’s a load of rubbish?’ Most of them put their hand up. I put my hand up too, ‘Me too,’ I tell them, ‘I used to think the same as you. But now I know why it didn’t work, and what I needed to do to give me this powerful tool (and it’s so powerful!) that can calm anxiety, anger - all big feelings.’ The thing is though, all powertools need a little instruction and practice to use them well. Breathing is no different. Even though we’ve been breathing since we were born, we haven’t been strong breathing through big feelings. When the ‘feeling brain’ is upset, it drives short shallow breathing. This is instinctive. In the same ways we have to teach our bodies how to walk, ride a bike, talk, we also have to teach our brains how to breathe during big feelings. We do this by practising slow, strong breathing when we’re calm. We also have to make the ‘why’ clear. I talk about the ‘why’ for strong breathing in Hey Warrior, Dear You Love From Your Brain, and Ups and Downs. Our kids are hungry for the science, and they deserve the information that will make this all make sense. Breathing is like a lullaby for the amygdala - but only when it’s practised lots during calm.♥️

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