About Karen Young

Karen began her career as a psychologist in private practice and is now recognised as a leading authority on child and adolescent anxiety. She has worked extensively with children, teens, and families, and in educational and organisational settings. She has lectured and has a Masters in Gestalt Therapy. It is through her work with children, teens, and families that she learned the power of solid information when it is placed in the solid, loving hands of parents or any important person in a child’s world. 

Karen created Hey Sigmund, an internationally popular online resource, to provide contemporary, research-driven information on the art of being human, and being with humans. The website has a particular emphasis on strengthening the mental wellness of children and adolescents. It attracts millions of readers each year worldwide. The articles have been translated into several languages and published on various international sites.

Karen is often invited to comment by Australian and international media outlets, including The Project, and as a regular guest on ABC Radio. She is a sought-after speaker and consultant and works with schools, government bodies, and child and adolescent-focused organisations, both in Australia and internationally to build resources, implement procedures, and support the professional development of staff. 

She is the author of six books, including the bestselling ‘Hey Warrior’, which alone has sold over 200,000 copies worldwide. Karen’s books creatively assist children to understand and manage anxiety and other feelings, and build the capacity for self-regulation. The books have been translated into a number of languages and have together sold more than 400,000 copies worldwide. 

Karen lives in Australia and has two children and two stepchildren. Experience has taught her that people can do amazing things with the right information, psychology has something for everyone, jargon doesn’t, everyone has a story to tell, short bios are the longest to write, nobody has it all figured out and the best people to be around are the ones who already know this.

About ‘Hey Sigmund’ – The idea behind the website.

Because sometimes the only diagnosis is ‘human’.

Every day there are stunning new insights into the human mind and the way we work, love, play, behave, relate, think and feel. We are learning more and more about what it means to be human, and how to master the art. Now more than ever, anybody who is any version of human has something to gain from the science of psychology.

This website contains the latest research and news in psychology. It attempts to bring psychology into the mainstream, unfolding the brilliance that happens within the scientific realm. We will explain what it all means and why it matters.

Some parts will be immediately relevant to your life, some parts less so but psychology is such a fascinating relevant science that at the very least you will have some excellent fodder for dinner table conversations.

The best of us is already in us, sometimes found, sometimes waiting to be. This website provides the tools to uncover what is waiting patiently beneath our skin to be discovered, or to make a life that is already beautiful, even more so.

I hope you enjoy the readings and find courageous, daring and simple ways to incorporate them into your life.

What This Website Is – And Isn’t.

The articles, information and comments on this website provide general information only and do not constitute advice in any way.

It is important to me that the information provided on this site is thoughtful, detailed, well-researched and relevant, but it is just a guide. What is best for you will depend on your personal history and circumstances. For this reason, if you require more support, information or guidance in relation to a particular issue, please speak with a medical practitioner or counsellor who will be able to take the time to understand the detail of you, your history and your circumstances, and use this to advise you on the most effective course of action.

If you are in need of more immediate support, please click here.

Business address: PO Box 511, Indooroopilly Qld 4069, Australia

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Consequences are about repair and restoration, and putting things right. ‘You are such a great kid. I know you would never be mean on purpose but here we are. What happened? Can you help me understand? What might you do differently next time you feel like this? How can we put this right? Do you need my help with that?’

Punishment and consequences that don’t make sense teach kids to steer around us, not how to steer themselves. We can’t guide them if they are too scared of the fallout to turn towards us when things get messy.♥️

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Oct 22

Open post by karenyoung_heysigmund with ID 18077374403118466
Consequences are about repair and restoration, and putting things right. ‘You are such a great kid. I know you would never be mean on purpose but here we are. What happened? Can you help me understand? What might you do differently next time you feel like this? How can we put this right? Do you need my help with that?’ Punishment and consequences that don’t make sense teach kids to steer around us, not how to steer themselves. We can’t guide them if they are too scared of the fallout to turn towards us when things get messy.♥️

karenyoung_heysigmund

Anxiety is driven by a lack of certainty about safety. It doesn’t mean they aren’t safe, and it certainly doesn’t mean they aren’t capable. It means they don’t feel safe enough - yet.

The question isn’t, ‘How do we fix them?’ They aren’t broken.

It’s, ‘How do we fix what’s happening around them to help them feel so they can feel safe enough to be brave enough?’

How can we make the environment feel safer? Sensory accommodations? Relational safety?

Or if the environment is as safe as we can make it, how can we show them that we believe so much in their safety and their capability, that they can rest in that certainty?

They can feel anxious, and do brave.

We want them to listen to their anxiety, check things out, but don’t always let their anxiety take the lead.

Sometimes it’s spot on. And sometimes it isn’t. Whole living is about being able to tell the difference.

As long as they are safe, let them know you believe them, and that you believe IN them. ‘I know this feels big and I know you can handle this. We’ll do this together.’♥️

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Oct 16

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Anxiety is driven by a lack of certainty about safety. It doesn’t mean they aren’t safe, and it certainly doesn’t mean they aren’t capable. It means they don’t feel safe enough - yet. The question isn’t, ‘How do we fix them?’ They aren’t broken. It’s, ‘How do we fix what’s happening around them to help them feel so they can feel safe enough to be brave enough?’ How can we make the environment feel safer? Sensory accommodations? Relational safety? Or if the environment is as safe as we can make it, how can we show them that we believe so much in their safety and their capability, that they can rest in that certainty? They can feel anxious, and do brave. We want them to listen to their anxiety, check things out, but don’t always let their anxiety take the lead. Sometimes it’s spot on. And sometimes it isn’t. Whole living is about being able to tell the difference. As long as they are safe, let them know you believe them, and that you believe IN them. ‘I know this feels big and I know you can handle this. We’ll do this together.’♥️

karenyoung_heysigmund

Research has shown us, without a doubt, that a sense of belonging is one of the most important contributors to wellbeing and success at school.

Yet for too many children, that sense of belonging is dependent on success and wellbeing. The belonging has to come first, then the rest will follow.

Rather than, ‘What’s wrong with them?’, how might things be different for so many kids if we shift to, ‘What needs to happen to let them know we want them here?’❤️

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Oct 13

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Research has shown us, without a doubt, that a sense of belonging is one of the most important contributors to wellbeing and success at school. Yet for too many children, that sense of belonging is dependent on success and wellbeing. The belonging has to come first, then the rest will follow. Rather than, ‘What’s wrong with them?’, how might things be different for so many kids if we shift to, ‘What needs to happen to let them know we want them here?’❤️

karenyoung_heysigmund

There is a quiet strength in making space for the duality of being human. It`s how we honour the vastness of who we are, and expand who we can be.

So much of our stuckness, and our children`s stuckness, comes from needing to silence the parts of us that don`t fit with who we `should` be. Or from believing that the thought or feeling showing up the loudest is the only truth.

We believe their anxiety, because their brave is softer - there, but softer.
We believe our `not enoughness`, because our `everything to everyone all the time` has been stretched to threadbare for a while.
We feel scared so we lose faith in our strength.

One of our loving roles as parents is to show our children how to make space for their own contradictions, not to fight them, or believe the thought or feeling that is showing up the biggest. Honour that thought or feeling, and make space for the `and`.

Because we can be strong and fragile all at once.
Certain and undone.
Anxious and brave.
Tender and fierce.
Joyful and lonely.
We can love who we are and miss who we were.

When we make space for `Yes, and ...` we gently hold our contradictions in one hand, and let go of the need to fight them. This is how we make loving space for wholeness, in us and in our children.

We validate what is real while making space for what is possible.

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Oct 12

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There is a quiet strength in making space for the duality of being human. It's how we honour the vastness of who we are, and expand who we can be. So much of our stuckness, and our children's stuckness, comes from needing to silence the parts of us that don't fit with who we 'should' be. Or from believing that the thought or feeling showing up the loudest is the only truth. We believe their anxiety, because their brave is softer - there, but softer. We believe our 'not enoughness', because our 'everything to everyone all the time' has been stretched to threadbare for a while. We feel scared so we lose faith in our strength. One of our loving roles as parents is to show our children how to make space for their own contradictions, not to fight them, or believe the thought or feeling that is showing up the biggest. Honour that thought or feeling, and make space for the 'and'. Because we can be strong and fragile all at once. Certain and undone. Anxious and brave. Tender and fierce. Joyful and lonely. We can love who we are and miss who we were. When we make space for 'Yes, and ...' we gently hold our contradictions in one hand, and let go of the need to fight them. This is how we make loving space for wholeness, in us and in our children. We validate what is real while making space for what is possible.

karenyoung_heysigmund

All feelings are important. What’s also important is the story - the ‘why’ - we put to those feelings.

When our children are distressed, anxious, in fight or flight, we’ll feel it. We’re meant to. It’s one of the ways we keep them safe. Our brains tell us they’re in danger and our bodies organise to fight for them or flee with them.

When there is an actual threat, this is a perfect response. But when the anxiety is in response to something important, brave, new, hard, that instinct to fight for them or flee with them might not be so helpful.

When you can, take a moment to be clear about the ‘why’. Are they in danger or

Ask, ‘Do I feel like this because they’re in danger, or because they’re doing something hard, brave, new, important?’

‘Is this a time for me to keep them safe (fight for them or flee with them) or is this a time for me to help them be brave?’

‘What am I protecting them from - danger or an opportunity to show them they can do hard things?’

Then make space for ‘and’, ‘I want to protect them AND they are safe.’

‘I want to protect them from anxiety AND anxiety is unavoidable - I can take care of them through it.’

‘This is so hard AND they can do hard things. So can I.’

Sometimes you’ll need to protect them, and sometimes you need to show them how much you believe in them. Anxiety can make it hard to tell the difference, which is why they need us.♥️

View Instagram post by karenyoung_heysigmund

Oct 9

Open post by karenyoung_heysigmund with ID 18402399316189479
All feelings are important. What’s also important is the story - the ‘why’ - we put to those feelings. When our children are distressed, anxious, in fight or flight, we’ll feel it. We’re meant to. It’s one of the ways we keep them safe. Our brains tell us they’re in danger and our bodies organise to fight for them or flee with them. When there is an actual threat, this is a perfect response. But when the anxiety is in response to something important, brave, new, hard, that instinct to fight for them or flee with them might not be so helpful. When you can, take a moment to be clear about the ‘why’. Are they in danger or Ask, ‘Do I feel like this because they’re in danger, or because they’re doing something hard, brave, new, important?’ ‘Is this a time for me to keep them safe (fight for them or flee with them) or is this a time for me to help them be brave?’ ‘What am I protecting them from - danger or an opportunity to show them they can do hard things?’ Then make space for ‘and’, ‘I want to protect them AND they are safe.’ ‘I want to protect them from anxiety AND anxiety is unavoidable - I can take care of them through it.’ ‘This is so hard AND they can do hard things. So can I.’ Sometimes you’ll need to protect them, and sometimes you need to show them how much you believe in them. Anxiety can make it hard to tell the difference, which is why they need us.♥️

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